It’s hard enough battling these thoughts, and the pain in general. It’s even harder battling alone, without any distractions. I need some silence though; I’ve had sensory overload and too much peopling. Lose/Lose situation. It’s lonely I don’t really want to talk about it with anyone, anymore. I don’t want to feel like a burden or I’m not worth anyone’s time, anymore. I don’t want to reach out, anymore.

I’m struggling so much and I just want the pain to go away. I don’t fit in anywhere. Why was I even born?

I’m so tired.

Today was bit of a challenging day, but not as challenging as days experienced in the last month or so. Possibly because I’ve been preoccupying my mind with other things.

I’m a bit tired with the universe throwing me so many curveballs. Give me a break, please. I just need at least a month when I’m not breaking down, stressing out, having panic attacks, etc.

I’ve gone through enough the past 30 years. Let me breathe and stop breaking my heart so many times, please and thank you.

My therapist said she’s proud of the hard work I’ve been doing on myself lately. I’m glad she can see the progress and my worth, because it’s hard to acknowledge from within. Working on that, though.

Feels like I’m missing a part of myself. Maybe the weight I used to carry. It kinda feels like having hundreds of pounds on your chest, and all of a sudden the weight is being lifted. Slowly. So you feel the adrenaline running through your body, your heart’s racing, butterflies in stomach, and it’s a bit hard to breathe sometimes.

Tomorrow is a new day.