Monthly Archives: September 2019
I have made so many mistakes lately. My mind has been so clouded that I impulsively acted on feelings – anxious feelings. I overthink. “Stop overthinking”, they say. Easier said than done. I would love to, but I just can’t sometimes.
My mind and thoughts can be so destructive. If I’m being hard on others, it’s because I’m battling something huge inside my mind. If I become quiet, I’m processing. If I’m processing, I overthink. If I’m overthinking, game over. Vicious cycle.
I know I need to sit and process these emotions to get them out of my system, but they can be so painful sometimes. No one else really seems to understand it or want to talk me through it – or maybe I just don’t want to be the source of any negative vibes.
So I hide. I don’t really want to go out. I do it because I feel bad saying “I can’t” all the time. But then I feel bad going and somehow getting lost in my thoughts – and I’m just quiet.
This is not easy, but I’m trying.
The Strongest Girls Have a Loved One In Heaven
Unlearning the Accustomed
Growing up, you will learn and be accustomed to behaviors and reactions to positive and negative situations. These will eventually become “the norm” throughout life.
These traits will subconsciously be apart of you and will positively or negativity impact you and others accordingly. Some traits inherited can be so toxic that you are oblivious to until it breaks you down and tears your life apart.
Sometimes you have to take a step back, take a break, and reset for the better. These moments are so mentally and emotionally demanding, but crucial to continue bettering yourself.
Sit through the feelings. Fighting them and pushing them aside will only make matters worse. Drinking to hide the feelings will only prolong the time to take life to the next level up. Drinking enhances the feelings and negative impact.
Take the time and energy to sit with the feelings. Figure out the cause of the feelings. Determine alternative approaches to the cause. It’s okay to make mistakes. The only thing you can do is learn from them and be patient with yourself.
Take it easy.
Clear your mind.
It will be okay.